Why are people treated differently if they have a mental disorder? Why are people so afraid to tell anyone about it? Why is going to a therapist a Big Secret? Why are people reacting to them in the extremes? Either giving them nauseating sympathy, or trying to be hush-hush about it and pretend that they don’t know anything about anything, while the truth is that you know. You know and all you do is gossip and talk about it, but never ever help that person. Why do you think that all these things are just a figment of the imagination? Made up by some people who are in need of some attention and are throwing tantrums? Since when did giving someone the cold shoulder become fashionable? And have you ever thought that someday you may have issues which will hurt? It will hurt like crazy, but then it will get worse, because you will feel apathy from others. Did you ever think, that making fun of that guy with Down’s Syndrome shows how sick you really are? When did you assume that your life is never going to have any problems and it will all go according to the script?
Well, answers to them, I don’t have. And even if I do, I don’t know if I can express them in words. What I will do is share some snippets of my ideas about it.
How do we even expect people to be comfortable with not being “normal”, when even within the bounds of normalcy, there is another elite class. And by this elite class, I mean a special and revered place for a select few. Maybe it’s someone who is a crowd pleaser, or someone who looks like they’ve won the genetic lottery, money, IQ, popularity. I don’t really know exactly what defines it, but I know it’s there as surely as I know my name. I find it rather droll, that here we are, all of us beautiful and wonderful people, who somehow are not okay with certain things in ourselves. And that is somehow magnified when we even look at someone else. Labelling people becomes an unconscious process. We think it helps us. It helps us remember that person. It makes sense taxonomically , perhaps. So we say that person is a bitch/loser/mental/psycho/weirdo/trannie/fatso/……..you can insert anything in here, actually.
Can you imagine what someone goes through when they’re called an ugly name? And the worst part is that they actually made an effort that day. Despite everything wrong in their lives, they got out of bed and made an effort. And with a few choice words, all that effort was slain. So when they’re trying and they’re beaten, they take it. They soldier on. But how about when they are not okay? Do you think they’d want to tell people about the thoughts driving them crazy? Hell, no! Why would they? Nobody wants to be ‘that person’. That person, who is every awkward conversation’s saviour. Because when people are done talking about the weather, they will come to them. And talk about their life like it was a pathetic tragedy.
So here’s my take on this. I know people can hurt, kill, and maim in ways that’s not a punishable offence under any law. So just find that one person who will be with you. And make that person yourself. Because setting someone else up to be your north star is full of perils. Find your options, because even though you might think you don’t have choices, you do. Believe in yourself, and only then can anyone else believe in you, or even listen to you. And if they don’t, then, to hell with them.
Whoever you are, you are not bad. You are awesome! You can only get better, if you choose.